Tuesday, December 23, 2014

A Fraidy-Cat

I was once a happy fellow, roughhousing with my furry roommate in Pennsylvania. But that all changed this past weekend when I had a run-in with some dogs, a bathtub and a blow dryer.

On Saturday, my human gave me up for adoption. His mother is my new owner and her name is Mary Gallagher Williams. She's such a nice lady. She even let me sit on her lap during the long drive to Maine.

I'm a Maine Coon cat, so I was excited to be moving to my ancestral land. We arrived in Maine four hours later. And I like my new digs.

However, the next day I felt uneasy when my new mom coaxed me into a wire box, put it in the backseat of the car, and started driving to who knows where. Why couldn’t I sit on her lap again?

I had a meltdown and peed in the cage. What could be more embarrassing than sitting in your own urine? My thick coat was now soaked. Did I mention I hate being wet?

I whined, but Mom just kept on driving, telling me everything would be okay soon. She didn't realize I had peed everywhere.

Finally, we arrived at her sister's house in the country. Mom said we’d be staying here while her sister is in Florida for Christmas. I don't care about all that stuff since my immediate concern was the pee soaking into my fur.

Mom carried the cage and me into the house. That's when I saw them. Two canine critters. They began to bark, growl and circle my cage like Indians circling a wagon train. Were they going to scalp me? After all, I do have a beautiful fur coat that Maine Coons are known for.

I tried hissing to chase away the dogs, but they just kept going around and around with their yappy war cry. Thankfully, Mom put the cage and me in the guestroom and shut the door. It was dark in there. Very dark.

Next thing I knew, Mom was carrying me tenderly in her arms. She cooed in my ear and tried to soothe my frazzled nerves. We entered another room that had a big vat filled with water. She called it the bathtub.

My heart began beating faster as she dangled me over that tub. I fought valiantly, but lost the good fight when she plunged me into the warm liquid. I like warmth, but did I mention I hate being wet?
How humiliating. The nerve of her taking this photo. Just look at me. Wouldn't you be horrified if someone took a picture of you looking like this? Did I mention I hate being wet?

Yes, I was once a happy-go-lucky kind of guy who used to play with his feline brother. However, within the last 24 hours, I've peed on myself, been circled by furry Indians, and took a dive into a tub full of water. I don't think my new human has my best interest at heart.

You would think I had enough trauma for one day, but no. She proceeded to point a thing at me that looked like a red gun. Although it dried my fur, the loud noise frightened me.
I tried swatting at the unseen enemy blowing out of the darn thing, but I couldn't stop it.

I'm a fraidy-cat and really scared. This lady is crazy mad.